The end…

…of our first holidays with our little man. I wouldn’t have even thought of it. When I saw the title on a discussion thread on a forum I flow, it brought a twinge of sadness. Today, Thanksgiving 2013 is the last first holiday we have as a family of 3. It feels so weird to think of it that way. It puts a large period at the end of the year.

There is one more first to celebrate before years end. That is his first birthday. It’s hard to believe year one of this journey is wrapping up. To think our little guy went from this:

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To this

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He’s grown so much. We’ve grown so much. There’s been a lot of change. A lot of going with our guts. Going against the grain. Striving to teach our son the best. Daily wondering if we’re doing it well. Watching in amazement as he grows and learns and SHARES with us.

While I am sure, there is still a long list of firsts in our future, it’s still hard.

With all this, I am ever reminded to live IN the moment. Take pictures at every chance (no matter what complaints come from the peanut gallery). To choose to enjoy each and every experience.

As much as this saddens me , it excites me to some extent. You see, the past month we have gotten bigger glimpses into his personality. He LOVES to share…everything…with everyone (pets included). He’s very loving and friendly. Stubborn…that was a given though. Little guy is absolutely hilarious. Such a bundle of joy, daily.

That’s what I need to focus on. I can’t stop him from getting older. Getting bigger. Developing more skills. But I can enjoy them. Encourage him. Teach him.

One chapter ends….

And another begins.

Today, I closed a chapter in life.
Today, I say good bye to a job that has had it’s ups and it’s downs.
Today, I trade a familiar job for something different.
Today, marked the end of daily time spent with clients who I have invested in over the past 2.5 years….
…and they into me.
Today, a few people cease to be coworkers…
…and morph into friends.

Tomorrow will be spent thanking God for all He’s done in my life in the past year.

He’s brought my family together…to the point of weekly (almost) dinners together.
He has given me a new role, one I am still learning.
He’s allowed friendships to crumble, only to rebuild to be better, stronger.
He’s given new, deeper meaning to other relationships.
He’s allowed my Dad to not only meet, but have a strong bond with my son.
Although we still struggle, he’s blessed our marriage.
He’s given us a support system beyond our wildest dreams.
He’s added to our family two new lives in 11 short months.

This weekend, will be focused on family. Not just family by birth, but the family that is made up of friends. This weekend, is the start to an extremely holiday season. This weekend starts new traditions.

Saturday, my love celebrates his birthday. It will be our 8 one together. His first as a daddy.

Monday a new chapter opens.
I’ll walk into a new building. With new coworkers. With new clients. With a new role.

While similar to the chapter that closed this afternoon, I cannot wait to see what new ventures lie ahead. God’s keeping me in this field for a reason, and I look forward to the journey that I’m on.

With all that said.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!

4 Quadrants

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Last night, at our small group we began discussing this diagram. 90% of the group stated they were in the cozy quadrant. A few in the stressful quadrant. Even less in the bored quadrant. And no one in the empowered quadrant.

I, myself, fell in with the few who said stressful. As I said last time, my life is lacking balance. As much as I thrive off of balance, I just can’t seem to get it yet. I find myself feeling like there is so much on my plate, yet I’m unable to control/remove any of it. Everything from being a wife, a mother, a full-time employee, and on and on.

I feel/hope/pray this stressful period is about ready to come to a head and then I’ll be able to move into the next season. All it is going to take is one step. One move. One transition. One that I see on the horizon. One that I am trying oh do hard to be patient to arrive.

Until then, I feel that prioritization is to be the tool I need to use. First needs to come my time with God. It doesn’t matter so much what it looks like, as long as it happens…daily. Next is my family, I need to remember to put them rich below God, or else time with them becomes shallow or unfulfilling. After that work, while I need to give my all to the place God has me, I also need to remember that God is who I am working for, not this around me.

I truly believe that if I can get those three things into perspective, then I will be able to get the rest of life into perspective as well. As for this blog, I’m not gonna stress about posting. When I have the urge to write I will write.

So that’s where I am right now.